Pregnancy is a unique and profound experience, filled with moments of joy, wonder, and a fair share of challenges. As I look back on my own journey, there are several things I wish I had known before embarking on this incredible path. Here, I share my reflections and insights in the hope that future parents can navigate their way with a little more ease and confidence.
The Unexpected Emotional Journey
When I first found out I was pregnant, I braced myself for the emotional rollercoaster that seems to be so commonly portrayed. You know, the mood swings, the tears over a spilled cup of coffee, and the overall emotional chaos. But to my surprise, my emotional journey during pregnancy was far less volatile than I expected.
While it’s true that many women experience heightened sensitivity and mood swings, it’s important to remember that every pregnancy is different. For me, the biggest emotional challenge wasn’t about drastic mood shifts—it was the anxiety about the unknown. I found myself constantly worrying about the baby’s development, what essentials we’d need for the newborn phase, and the looming question of how childbirth would go.
I quickly learned that the best thing I could do for my emotional well-being was to simply accept what I was feeling. Pregnancy is full of unknowns, and understanding that many of my emotions were being influenced by hormones (and the natural anxiety of the situation) made them easier to navigate. If you find yourself struggling, don’t hesitate to seek out support—whether it’s talking to a professional or joining a pregnancy support group. Talking it through can be incredibly helpful
The Impact on Physical Health
I expected the usual stuff—morning sickness, some aches and pains, maybe a few cravings thrown in for good measure. But what I didn’t expect was just how intense the physical toll of pregnancy would be, especially in those early weeks.
Fatigue hit me like a truck. I could barely keep my eyes open some days, and the exhaustion wasn’t just a “need a nap” kind of tired—it was bone-deep. Then came the constant nausea, which wasn’t limited to mornings at all. It lingered all day, making it hard to eat, think, or function like a human. Food aversions popped up left and right (I couldn’t even look at some of my favorite meals), and the back pain? Let’s just say it showed up a lot earlier than expected.
Yes, these are all common pregnancy symptoms—but I honestly wasn’t prepared for how relentless they could be. And here’s the thing: no two pregnancies are alike. What I went through in my first trimester might not be what you experience, and that’s okay. Every journey is different, and it’s important we talk about the hard parts too—not just the glowing bump photos.
Here are some items that helped me through my nausea:
- Reliefband: this is an anti-nausea wristband that can be found on Amazon. It helped me get through my day with minimal impact from nausea and even helped me get through my family’s Disney trip.
- Nausea Medication: My nausea was so bad I was able to get a prescription from my doctor.
- Dramamine: This would help in a pinch but was not as effective as what my doctor prescribed.
- Gum: This was a huge surprise help with my nausea. I found that spearmint gum would help reduce the level of nausea significantly.
Unexpected Challenge of Insomnia
One of the symptoms I wasn’t fully prepared for during pregnancy was insomnia. Sure, I’d had my fair share of restless nights before, but nothing compared to the level of exhaustion combined with an inability to sleep that hit me around the middle of my second trimester. The oddest part was that I would feel utterly drained, yet sleep seemed to elude me, no matter what I tried.
Typically, when I couldn’t sleep, I’d reach for melatonin or some other sleep aid. But with pregnancy, my options were suddenly much more limited. I tried herbal teas, deep breathing, and meditation to calm my mind and body, but none of it seemed to work. I couldn’t help but wonder if this was my body’s way of preparing me for the sleepless nights ahead with a newborn, where rest would come in unpredictable and fragmented bursts.
Either way, it was frustrating—and it left me feeling drained at times when I needed energy the most. Pregnancy insomnia definitely took me by surprise, and it’s something I wish I’d been more mentally prepared for.
If you’re facing similar struggles, here are a few sleep aids that are commonly recommended for pregnant women (though you should always consult your doctor before trying any new remedies):
- Herbal Tea: Lavender, oatstraw, and lemon balm are known for their calming effects and can help relax you before bedtime.
- Unisom: This over-the-counter antihistamine can help with sleep, but make sure to consult your doctor first.
- Benadryl: Similar to Unisom, this can be helpful for sleep, but it’s important to check with your healthcare provider.
- Meditation: Taking a few minutes to meditate or practice deep breathing before bed can help calm your mind and body.
- Establish a Good Bedtime Routine: Try to maintain a consistent sleep schedule, avoiding screen time and creating a relaxing bedtime ritual to help signal to your body that it’s time to rest.
Insomnia is a common part of pregnancy for many women, but it can feel like a lonely struggle. If you’re in the same boat, know you’re not alone—and that this sleepless phase will eventually pass!
Leaking During Pregnancy
One of the pregnancy symptoms I definitely wasn’t prepared for was leaking from my boobs. I knew that breast leakage would happen after the baby arrived, but I didn’t expect it to start before my little one was even here.
It was early in my third trimester, and I was already struggling with insomnia when I suddenly felt a wetness on my breast. I got up, went to the bathroom, and to my surprise, there was a yellow liquid leaking out. My first reaction? Panic, of course. I immediately Googled it (because what else do you do when something unexpected happens during pregnancy?) and found out that what I was experiencing was perfectly normal.
The yellow liquid is called colostrum, the first form of milk your body produces before your baby arrives. It turns out, some women can start leaking this as early as the second trimester—so it’s actually pretty common. For some, it’s just a few drops, while others might notice yellow or orange stains on their shirts or bras.
So, if you find yourself in the same situation, don’t freak out like I did. It’s just your body preparing for the journey ahead. While it’s a little strange at first, it’s completely normal and part of the pregnancy process.
Unexpected Reality of Baby Kicks
When I first heard about baby kicks, I was prepared for the idea of this magical, beautiful sensation where you get to feel your little one moving inside you. Friends and family described it as a heartwarming experience, something that connected you even more to your baby. But what I wasn’t fully prepared for was just how intense and, well, downright weird the kicks could get.
Sure, I was thrilled to feel those first little movements—it meant my baby was healthy and active. But let me be honest: the sensation wasn’t exactly what I expected. As the kicks became stronger and more consistent, they started feeling much more alien than magical. It was a strange mix of excitement and discomfort, especially when my baby seemed to have a particular knack for finding my hip bone, bladder, and cervix.
But the real kicker (no pun intended) came when I felt a particularly strong jab to my cervix and pelvic floor. That feeling, especially in my vagina, totally caught me off guard. Seeing my stomach move like it was having a life of its own was equally eye-opening—and let’s just say, it was both fascinating and a little creepy at the same time.
Here’s the thing: it’s totally okay to feel weirded out by all of this. While feeling your baby move is definitely a sign that they’re healthy, it can also make you feel like you have an alien living inside you. Those kicks can be intense, and sometimes, they can even be a little overwhelming. It’s all part of the journey, and it’s completely normal to be freaked out by the sensations, no matter how much you’re told it’s a “magical” experience.
Pregnancy is full of surprises, and this was definitely one of the most unexpected ones for me. But remember, it’s okay to feel however you feel about it. Your body is doing something amazing, even if it feels a little strange along the way.
The Significance of Self-Care
Taking time for self-care isn’t selfish—it’s absolutely essential, especially during pregnancy. For a long time, I thought that focusing on myself might feel indulgent or unnecessary, but what I quickly learned was that making time for activities that bring me joy and relaxation was vital to my well-being. Whether it was curling up with a good book, soaking in a warm bath, or simply taking a quiet walk, these moments of self-care helped me recharge and feel more balanced.
Self-care shouldn’t be something we just squeeze in when we have time—it should be a priority, not an afterthought. Pregnancy can be physically and emotionally draining, so it’s important to give yourself permission to take breaks and focus on your own needs, too.
One self-care activity I cannot recommend enough is a prenatal massage. If you’re dealing with the usual pregnancy discomforts—like hip pain, backaches, or swollen feet—this is an absolute game-changer. I’ll never forget the Christmas gift my sister-in-law gave me: a prenatal massage gift card. Honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever been so grateful for a gift in my life! The massage was incredibly relaxing, and it helped alleviate the constant back pain I had been struggling with for weeks.
If you’re able to, I highly recommend treating yourself to a prenatal massage—your body (and mind) will thank you. And don’t forget, self-care can be as simple as carving out a little time each day for yourself, even if it’s just five minutes of quiet time. You deserve it!
Embracing the Changes
Pregnancy changes your body in ways you never quite expect, and while some of those changes are beautiful, others can feel a bit challenging to embrace. Weight gain, stretch marks, and a growing belly are all part of the process, but for me, it often felt like my body was no longer my own. Simple things—like getting in and out of furniture, bending over to put on socks, or even just breathing while tying my shoes—became unexpectedly difficult.
It took me a while to realize that these physical changes weren’t something to fear or resent. Instead, they were signs of the incredible work my body was doing as it nurtured a new life. If I could go back, I wish I had embraced those changes with more gratitude and self-love, rather than focusing on how self-conscious I felt or worrying about getting back to my pre-pregnancy shape.
Pregnancy is a beautiful and complex journey, and accepting your body as it changes can be one of the most empowering things you can do for yourself. It’s easy to get caught up in societal pressures or compare ourselves to the “perfect” images of pregnancy, but the truth is, your body is doing something amazing.
So, my advice to any expecting mama out there: treat yourself with kindness, celebrate the changes, and know that you’re doing something incredible. You’re not losing your body—you’re transforming it into a vessel for new life, and that’s worth celebrating.
The Power of Prenatal Education
One of the most valuable lessons I learned during my pregnancy was the importance of prenatal education. Before diving into the world of labor and delivery, I had no idea just how much knowledge could help ease the anxiety that came with the unknown. Attending childbirth classes and reading books about pregnancy and childbirth gave me the confidence I needed to face the challenges ahead.
Learning about the stages of labor, different pain management techniques, and what to expect during delivery helped me feel much more prepared. The more I understood, the less I feared—and that made a world of difference when the big day came.
There are so many resources out there, whether you prefer in-person classes or learning from the comfort of your own home. My husband and I chose to invest in an in-person class that covered everything from labor and delivery to postpartum care. However, I know that schedules and finances don’t always allow for this, so I wanted to share some great online alternatives that can help you prepare for this big life event:
- Hospital Websites: While not every hospital offers them, many provide free online webinars or videos to help you get familiar with childbirth basics.
- YouTube: There’s a wealth of video content out there covering everything from breathing techniques to the stages of labor. A quick search can lead you to exactly what you need.
- Local Library: Your library is a hidden gem! If you have a library card, you can access both books and internet resources to research pregnancy and childbirth for free.
The key is to find what works for you and make sure you feel as informed and confident as possible. Everyone’s pregnancy journey is unique, but knowledge is one way to help you feel a little more in control of the experience.
Final Thoughts
As I reflect on my pregnancy journey, I realize there were so many truths no one quite told me about, and I’m sure I’m not alone in this. While the excitement and joy of becoming a mom are undeniable, the realities of pregnancy can be a bit more intense than we often hear about. From the emotional ups and downs to the surprising strength of baby kicks, there’s a lot more to the experience than the glowing pregnancy photos we often see.
In the end, pregnancy is a personal journey—one full of surprises and challenges that you may not always feel prepared for. But it’s also a beautiful, transformative process, and it’s important to embrace it with kindness and understanding, both for your body and your emotions. What no one tells you is that it’s okay to feel everything, whether it’s excitement, fear, joy, or even discomfort. Every part of the journey is valid, and you’re not alone in navigating it.
